We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
And then my night got REAL pukey
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
