It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize
