TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
only you would photoshop your dick
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
