He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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