I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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