im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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