So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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