Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
bring money and cleavage
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
