Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
