We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
