i jhust puked up my retainher.
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Randomize