i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
