so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
