Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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