i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize
