He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I think a kid would responsible me up
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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