the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
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