I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
It's just like the Real World with babies
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
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