Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
