Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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