She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
