you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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