And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I just gargled with NyQuil
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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