Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
