i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
wakey wakey hands off snakey
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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