im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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