my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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