you would pick up someone in the library
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
