oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I understand Curling. That high.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Randomize
