if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize
