his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
ttyl tear gas
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Randomize
