It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
