i may or may not be watching the land before time
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Randomize
