But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
