these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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