I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
