I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize