Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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