Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
it's like iHOP with fire
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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