Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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