Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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