ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Randomize
