i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize