I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
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