What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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