Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
