The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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