im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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