Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Randomize
