So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
