HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
All I want is dick and wine.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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