She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Randomize
